Further contemplations of religion
Sunday, Feb. 24, 2008, 22:59

Let's see... where to begin...

Edwin left Friday, which was a long day since the children and I got up at o' dark thirty to take him to base, and we didn't get home until after eleven in the afternoon. Other than chilling out, the children did their best to push my buttons... and almost succeeded. Luckily, I was able to suppress my frustration enough to only send them to bed early as punishment. The next day, hoping to keep restlessness at bay, I took the kids to Charleston. There, we hung out with a couple of friends and treated the children to the local fun park.... where they enjoyed racing go-karts and screaming drop-towers.

As for my self, I enjoyed having a couple of adults to talk to about anything and everything... not to mention they were both a great help with the kids. So, after a semi-stress-free day, we came home to curl up in our warm beds. Today, I vegged out on the couch watching the tv while the kids played outside and in their rooms. I was surprised to find that I only had to send them to their beds twice. This gives me hope that the loss of "daddy" will fade away somewhat quickly... at least until his return begins to close in on us.

Since that covers the "tangible" aspects of my weekend, I will now look at the "intangibles." For anyone who read my last post, I am still seriously contemplating witchcraft/wicca as a possible spiritual guidance/religion. After 25 years of living with the teachings of what others have wanted for me, I am actually looking forward to experiencing something that I want for my self for a change. Again, I have nothing against Christianity and the "known" religions. However, as I said before, they have never sat well with how I feel.

For those worried that I may be looking for something that can be read in a book or watched on a movie screen, please do not worry. I am not that naive. However, as a wise friend has pointed out... and I have always known to be true... my exploration is more of a natural spirituality. I have always felt at peace with nature, and I am hoping that witchcraft/wicca will allow me to become "whole again"... and maybe something as simple as "feeling at ease in my own skin."

I am not looking for short-cuts, as I do not wish for any... simply put, I just want to have the chance to explore my own wants and desires without worrying over what someone else may think.

~Blessed Be

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